1 to Infinite

 

My lovely boyfriend and I celebrated our first anniversary. Today is one of the best days in my life. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BABY! I’m proud to say that we have made it already this far. Because staying in a long distance relationship is very hard for sure.

It seems so unreal. Knowing that I’m still together with someone who’s not with me for months, physically. 1 year. 1 year I’ve been praying for peace of heart and strength. It’s not easy, it’s still not easy. It’s not easy when the one you love has to be far away from you and it’s not easy when you see other people have all the time in the world to be physically close to their loved ones. When I think about it deeply, I realize that my relationship is composed of messaging and 30 minutes to 1 hour video call. That’s what I have. It’s more of dates over FB Messenger, chatting with him and making kissy and huggy noises over a phone call when we both say goodnight to each other. It’s not exactly the ideal relationship someone wants, but that’s what I have.

Distance isn’t meant for everyone. It’s not easy and a lot of people give up. I’ve also heard so many times that it can break a relationship more than it can make it. Not a lot of people believe that it can work and not a lot of people would be willing to take this risk. But for those who experience the latter, they know what strength is, they have a great understanding of patience and a deep value for time. It’s not just about the distance, it’s also going to be about the time difference, the need for internet connection to communicate (cause I’m pretty sure international text is going to be a killer) and our patience for and with each other.
4e16319f4126cc498d0316b73743e8d5 It doesn’t stop me from believing that this can be different. I guess at the end of everything, I don’t really see the distance, because all I see is the other person at the end of all the kilometers and miles that separate me from him and to know that I still have a clear vision of him at the end of everything, it makes me want to do whatever it takes and whatever I can to go through with this.

So I’ve been with John for one year already and we’ve experience being apart for several months. It hasn’t been easy, and I can’t stress that enough.

But, this is the choice I make to love him every day. To pick up the phone and message him good morning or good night. To remember that he’s the first one I can still call when things go bad, when things go good. To ask him how his day went. To see his face and laugh with him. That part of the relationship is actually pretty easy, keeping him in my life.

Not easy is seeing couples hold hands and knowing I can’t have that. Not today, not tomorrow, not next week, not when things go good or when things go bad. I have to wait and be patient until the next time that I can hold his hand, which is the next time that we see each other, it makes it all the more meaningful the next time. You don’t know what it’s like to go through the joy of seeing him and dreading the start of the countdown. Day 1, and the next day inches closer to the day you have to let him go again.

Most times the situation challenges you to your limits and makes you want to give up. It makes you ask so many questions like why do I have to wait for someone like this, am I ever going to be with this person, how long is it gonna take before we really end up.

13782037_10206805463159173_832327533217815992_n

Fortunately, my luck falls on John and the kind of man that he is. If he wasn’t the one I was going through this hell-hole with, I wouldn’t have made it to 1 year of long distance. BUT (yeah, big but), I’m happy and it’s been worth it. He’s been worth it. Especially when you see that through all your weaknesses and failures, his love still preserves and he always chooses to see the best in me when I forget to see myself that way.

We’ve been realistic. We know that there’s still a lot that can happen to us, especially since we still have our lives ahead of us. A lot of things have changed through the course of our relationship. We’re not rushing into anything, to be honest. We both know that right now we love each other a lot to keep ourselves committed to one another, but we will not, in any way, sacrifice the dreams that we want for ourselves.

So we’ve actually been good at this. We’re both balancing out ourselves and the relationship and we give each other time to breathe and do our own things, live our own lives while we’re both away from each other. Most importantly, we support each other grow on our own and discover new things and abilities without the other, as well as discover new things we want and new things that could be in store for us. We never pull the other down; we both know that we plan to be together, just not now. Right now we have ourselves. Right now we have months of being independent and we want to maximize that for ourselves before entering into a really serious commitment (which is marriage duh #letsberealhere). We’re both really happy. We’re not holding each other back or denying ourselves the little bubble of happiness we get from our relationship too and that’s been the best part and that’s why it’s all been worth it.

I have to get by September, October, November, December and only God knows how many more months in 2017 till I can see him again. But I guess no matter what happens in our relationship we’d both love to see each other again and again and we both know that we’ll always love each other.

And we both trust in that.  I just hope that, that will be enough to keep us together.

Processed with VSCO with t1 preset

So, right now, I want to thank my boyfriend, John for never failing to make me feel like a princess every single day even though we’re thousand miles apart. You’re the most dependable, most protective, and most caring guy. In spite of my nonchalance and occasional air of ungratefulness, please know that I appreciate all this, that I appreciate all of you and that I wouldn’t have it any other way with anybody else. I’ll always stick around with you. For 1 year we shared a lot of great memories together and I will forever cherish them. Cheers to more adventure, more crazy and unforgettable moments together. I wish I could spend our day with you.

So love and enjoy the distance that you have instead of complaining about it more than you appreciate it because the more you complain, the more it causes disdain. And stress and pity-partying and just everything else that could break a perfectly good relationship. Be more appreciative and forgiving and everything will be alright!

I’ll see you soon baby. I love you and miss you always!!

Long Distance Love

Many people believe that long distance relationships are never going to work out. Nobody says it is going to be easy – that extra distance that makes many things unachievable. Things could get complicated, and you could get sad and lonely at times. I’m not going to lie to you; long distance relationships are probably the toughest kind of relationships, the ones that actually require you to give in every single thing you’ve got, the ones that can turn you into the one of the most frustrated people on the planet, and the ones that can actually make you start questioning and begin to understand why you ever agreed to put yourself through this. The endless struggle of not seeing each other, making late night phone calls and keeping the fire alive is all too real. But, there’s no denying that as challenging as it is or was, living apart from one another only brought you and your significant other closer together.

9ad1050b7a509c2b47da676968e86f0d

I, like many other happy people on this earth, have found myself in a long distance relationship and while it might be difficult, it’s working out just fine for my boyfriend and I.  For the first six months of my current relationship, I had been living between eleven to fourteen hours away from my boyfriend. We had known of each other for several months until last September, both of us decided to level up our friendship and continues on a more serious relationship; however, I never experienced a serious long distance relationship beforehand.

It completely changed when my boyfriend made serious career changes and decided to work on a cruise ship line which means he’ll be thousand miles away from me travelling from one country to another. Because I don’t want to be a hindrance for his dream and I want him to be happy. I supported him in whatever dream/s he has. I also understand that if we both have our time apart to achieve some of our goals, then we can have a future where we achieve the rest together

Just like any other long distance relationship plays out, we struggled, grew and learned to love in our particular way. It was difficult but we were committed to make things work out. It’s very challenging and being in this kind of relationship has changed me a lot. You both need to adjust with each other time and schedule. It’s hard but I know it will be worth it. Being in a long distance relationship is never easy. You need to deal with the distance, time difference, the loneliness, and even jealousy of the people who get to see your significant other. Long distance relationship may be tough but it has its own surprises too.

My boyfriend and I are in such relationship and so far, we’re getting the hang of it. But sometimes, no, every single day I just can’t help to miss him. It’s hard being away from the one you love. Only people who spend their days missing another person like we do truly understand how hard it is to see someone so important to you on a screen and only on a screen. And even more annoying, every time your data is crappy or your wifi cuts out, your connection is lost or you’re left reconnecting for minutes on end. It’s absolutely infuriating.

When time difference is such real bitch, whether it’s an hour or 12, being on another time zone is a constant struggle. When you’re waking up, he’s half-finished with his day. He’s headed to bed long before you’re even thinking about clocking out for the night. I know it isn’t the end of the world and it can be managed with a little compromise between you two.

1

There are times you’ll worry for no reason about stupid things. That’s the thing about distance; it can make you a bit paranoid. I don’t even know where to start on this one. I’m sure other women out there understand what I’m trying to say. Let’s just say that when you’re thousand miles away, TRUST and UNDERSTANDING is a big deal. Without those two things, your relationship will fail. I promise you that. Now, I know you might be getting a bit worked up. But you don’t have to mistrust him while thinking of horrible scenarios in your head. For me anyway, I know that any awful thing that crawls into my mind isn’t true. It also helps when you know what they’re doing and who they’re with. It leaves less blanks for your mind to fill in. It requires a lot of understanding. Understanding that his day change and our schedules are different. And that’s okay. All you have to do is understand that things get busy, and that you talk when you can. However, if you believe in your heart that the person your with loves you as much as you love them, you’ve got nothing to worry about. If you trust one another, you’ll come away from your time apart a stronger couple.

I learned to adjust with my boyfriend’s schedule. I’m getting the hang of talking to him more or less one hour everyday or I say whenever his schedule is not that hectic. Even though sometimes I feel bad I wasn’t able to talk to him or see him, I can’t complain about it. The most I can do is to wait for him to be online and sit from across a screen just to look at each other faces and talk to each other as much time as we possibly can. Just being in different time zones makes scheduling much harder than it needs to be. You have to sacrifice sleep and learn how to make time and prioritize your significant other.

Yes, the waiting can be painful. It sure as hell it isn’t a Hollywood romance. Sometimes you feel like giving up, but you chose to keep going. You need to remind yourself that the results at the end will be sweet as heaven. I see every second, every minutes of our conversation as a blessing. No matter how short the time we have talking to each other. I love him and I hope this waiting, this long distance relationship will be worth it. The little things he does for me are the big things. Getting an “I love you”, “I miss you” and such a simple “Good morning” and “Good night” text in the middle of the day or when you wake up feels like getting flowers from him. It’s pleasant to know that you’re the first and last thing on your boyfriends’ mind. You appreciate the littlest things so much that the bigger things feel even better.

But at the end of the day, when all is said and done, when all your heart and soul has been put into this one part of your life, you will know and be proud of the fact that your relationship has come out a lot stronger and has become more resilient than an average relationship could ever be. With God in the center of our relationship, I know everything will be fine in the end. I’m just excited to see my love, to kiss and to hug him tight.

Are you in the beginning, the middle or end of a long distance relationship? Be strong and take heart!! Here’s to us and a love that survives even the longest bouts of separation. If you’re in a committed relationship and serious about your significant other, the time spent apart will seem short in the long run. It takes time to grow together but you’ll find that distance, no matter how painful, truly makes the heart grow fonder.